What I Did on My Sabbatical

Nothing.

If that were the case, I’d consider it a successful Sabbatical. I would have thus been rested, restored and recharged. But alas, I did a lot of things, sprinkled in with plenty of nothing.

I had three goals for my hiatus from May thru July: 

1. Get healthier, mentally and physically. 
   
2. Organize my sports cards for potential sale. 
3. Start writing a book. 

I actually had a rough start in May, particularly for Goal #1. I have been battling migraines since the beginning of the year, with each one getting progressively worse. I was prescribed a med that should stop the migraine once the symptoms start, and the next time, it worked.

Then in the beginning of May, right after I started my Sabbatical, I got another one that blew right through the med. The severe symptoms lasted over 10 hours. Welcome to your time off, Kline! This triggered a series of tests, including a brain MRI. Fortunately – using my daughter’s poke at her old man – there was nothing there. My doctor said finding the cause of migraines “is like chasing ghosts.” We haven’t caught one yet.

The conclusion was that this was most likely related to stress and anxiety. I was prescribed stronger meds for the next occurrence of symptoms. Praise the Lord, I have not had a reoccurrence in the last 3+ months. Apparently, the down time has actually worked, at least for now.

Toward that end, I’ve gotten in quite a bit more golf during this time off. I’m not a good golfer, but I can honestly say, after playing a couple times a week this summer, I’m still not a good golfer. I’ve also gone to see several T-Rats and Brewer games, which is always fun until they lose.

As for Goal #2, I failed to appreciate what a massive project getting all my cards organized and inventoried would be. I estimate that I have about 100,000 cards. To sort them, put them in numerical order and catalog the total for each card was tedious on steroids. Not only that, most of my cards are pre-1990, so I’d see a favorite player I hadn’t thought about in years and get lost in the stats on the card, or remembering when the Bills almost won the Super Bowl. That’s not healthy.

I got through about 10,000 cards. I’ll work on the rest on my days off and should be done right before Jesus comes again. Or the Bills win the Super Bowl, whichever comes first.

Goal #3 was the most intriguing experience during this extended retreat. Before I get to that, I should share that Debbie and I got to travel more than we usually do. We spent a long weekend in Door County and another in Eagle River.

Then, in June, I spent two weeks at the hunting cabin up north. I had planned this for over a year, that most of my time there would be on my own (Deb came up on the weekends – we saw a couple moose!). Part of my rationale was that I needed some time and space to totally decompress. If you know me you know that I am just a little bit extroverted and can be a rather social person. But if I am going to get my head (and heart) on straight and get healthy, I would need some alone time.

This actually scared me going in. I’ve never taken two weeks off from everything and everyone. I didn’t know if I could handle that. If I couldn’t, then I might as well had back home and get back to work, carrying the same bad habits and unhealthy processes with me.

That’s when I caught the devil trying to trap me. I was doing the same thing I always used to do: pressuring myself to be Superman or Superfail, all based on my own ability to do it all myself, to save myself. And Jesus stepped in.

I wanted this time alone, not only to rest and relax, but to explore this book idea I’ve had for over 10 years now. And that’s what I did. What we did, actually. Jesus became a tangible part of the creative process, in a sense.

Without giving away too much, a significant part of the premise is conversations with Jesus. I had immersed myself in the relevant sections of Scripture that would inspire the creative aspects of those conversations. Prayer and meditation have been essential disciplines along the way.

As I worked my storyboard and started making notes for each main point, I was crafting the lines I would have coming from Jesus. I was getting rather excited about the direction this was going, even if I had to stop and backspace or highlight and delete a few times.

At one particular moment, Jesus stopped me dead in my tracks. I thought I had produced a wonderfully poignant line for Him to say. And the impression that burst into my mind was: “I would never say that.” Of course, He was right.

Now we Lutherans don’t get into special revelation, where the Voice speaks to us apart from His Word. And this was not that. We do hold to inspiration from the Spirit in our thoughts and words, which is what I’d been counting on for the whole project. This was different. It was more.

I realized right then and there that Jesus was with me. I’ve always know that. We all know that. But at that exact second in time, I could say now I Know. He was reminding and reinforcing in such a way that the self-imposed pressure dispersed, and the joy of Knowing Jesus exploded.

I got about as far with writing the book as I did with the baseball cards. But now I am thoroughly and joy-fully committed to going the distance, and not in another 10 years.

Something my wife told me, as I was starting to feel the usual stress I manufacture, this time about accomplishing the Three Goals, really hit home. She said, “So what if you don’t actually finish each one? Who’s going to rip on you for that? The point is you’re trying to be healthy.” I now realize, even if she didn’t know it, that that was Jesus talking again.

Many of you don’t know Debbie much. She prefers to stay off stage. The two greatest accomplishments of my Sabbatical was spending more time with Jesus, and more time with Deb. No evening meetings to go to. More travel together. We went down to Atlanta in July to see the newlyweds, and then spent five days in Hilton Head in 100 degree heat. We both became people of color. We jumped in the waves. We saw a couple alligators! It was glorious.
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I learned that Jesus time comes first, and Debbie time second. Pastor time is now a distant third.